Basically, the whole film as it celebrates male camaraderie in uniform. Watch the briefing scene where two guys put their arms around each other. Then there is the officer’s demand: “I want someone’s butt now” followed immediately by: “I want some butt!”. Then there is the hard-on discussion. And so on it goes on (to […] More

Here’s our man playing rock-god Stacee Jaxx. Before bursting into Wanted Dead or Alive, Pour Some Sugar On Me, and I Want to Know What Love Is, Tom spends a huge chunk of the movie prancing around in leather chaps and an accompanying studded jock strap. Both could have come straight off the shelf at […] More

Tom has been topless in every one of his 50 movies except Valkyrie (see below) and Collateral (where he is clearly out-hunked by Jason Statham). In the 80s, fans joked that Tom Cruise could never keep his shirt on: “Woh! Look its fallen off again”. This is for his female fans we guess, but it […] More

Matt and Trey, the guys behind our favourite irreverent cartoon, have one rule: if you complain about the jokes they make at your expense, they come at you harder in the next episode. In one episode, Tom Cruise runs into a bedroom and hides in a closet for the whole show. Several characters ask repeatedly: […] More

Without question, the best full-frontal and full ‘nude from behind’ scene. It starts with Tom waking up nude in a morgue and lasts for over a minute as he starts wandering around chatting to the un-dead. There’s no attempt to cover his asshole or the meat and two veg on show. He looks great for […] More

And so the military male-bonding continues unabashed, culminating in a legendary locker-room scene where Crusie is bent over in just his underpants. There’s an extensive conversation with another prancing and strutting macho uniformed figure, before the other guy puts his hand on Tom’s character. ‘Don’t ask Don’t Tell’ might have been the rule in the […] More

Ass shots, ass shots, and even more ass shots. His directors seem fixated by Tom’s ass – as are we. In every film there are lingering scenes on his ass. Our Top 3 scenes: 1. Best ass in a suit goes to Mission Impossible 4 where he is running away from the sandstorm in the […] More

The movie about the attempt to kill Hitler. As mentioned above, Tom’s shirt stays on in this one, in keeping with the film’s serious subject matter. But, and it’s a big butt, take a look at the scene which starts around 5.21 minutes in. There’s an incredible shot of his ass which has caused a […] More

Tom’s first movie, made when he was a cute 18 year old. You will be shocked by the shortest ripped denim shorts in history. Even Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke in the Dukes of Hazard, or Kylie in her Spinning Around video, would claim that they show too much ass cheek. But not our teenage […] More

Yes, it’s back on this list for a third time. Has there ever been a straight scene that has looked gayer than the two-minute beach volleyball scene here? The all-male military teams are just in their Speedos, oiled up, suntanned, and with loads of visible sweat in front of 30 topless hairy dudes. The macho […] More